What happens when you uncover a family secret?
I was in my early 20’s when a family secret came to light.
It was painful, confusing, and tore us apart for a little while.
To protect the privacy of all the family members involved, I won’t tell you what the secret was but what I can say is that it created incredible heartbreak for us as a large, loving, extended family.
Suddenly, there were “sides”, and people who were deeply connected before now had to renegotiate some of their relationships both within and outside the family.
We had to honestly and courageously explore the parallel narrative that was unearthed and deal with the fall-out. We had to let things totally crumble before we could even think about the re-build.
We had to watch my once-fierce-but-now-frail grandmother try to make sense of it all as the matriarch of the family.
In a word, it was awful.
Decades later though, I see can see beyond the heartbreak of what happened.
Now, I am so grateful that the secret came out and that people in my family were willing to walk through fire to renew our relationships and come to a new normal.
I am grateful that we were able to mend the heart-wrenching rifts that were created when the secret came out.
I am grateful and proud to be a member of this incredible family who always finds a way to grow through the pain.
But it took time us plenty of time and unwavering patience to get to the other side of that secret.
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